Xmas = Reindeer urine?

So you hate Christmas...who doesn't! Those blasted songs, the overt commercialism, the obvious link to Pagan celebrations of the Sun gods...What is the link between Xmas and Magic Mushrooms (Fly Agaric - Amanita Muscaria).

A Shaman would remove the more potent toxins so that it was safe to eat and would go on a little "trip" with his reindeer guides, and hopefully return with knowledge of the otherworld, and not just a nasty hang-over. His "Ho Ho Ho" laugh was brought on by the euphoric laugh of the shrooms. Coming down the chimney (The door and chimney were the same) in his Yurt, reminds us of that jolly fat man.

Now where does the urine come into play? Reindeer were uncommonly fond of drinking human urine that contained muscimol (the potent stuff). Now the villagers were also quite fond of the yellow snow because the potency of the muscimol was not weakened and was actually safer. It is said (and I don't speak from experience) that the effects of the shroom can pass through 5 or 6 people and still give you a buzz. Most would just stick to reindeer pee and given the option, I would too. Reindeers would eat the funny mushroom and pee out the hallucinogenic part of the drug. This is probably where the expression "get pissed" came from! So the reindeer where not flying, they were just high!

What about Rudolph's red nose? Dipping into the liquor cabinet again? Rudolph's nose being red was probably due to a parasitic infection of his respiratory system (such as Linguatula Arctica, Cephenemyia Trompe, Dictoyvaulus, Elaphostrongylus Rangiferi are among the parasites that might have found a home in that famous snout). Rudolph was apparently also castrated (since he still had antlers during winter), but that is a long story...

So, Santa is a stoner, who drinks reindeer urine which makes him fly around with his reindeer guides. Maybe instead of receiving gifts, we can all do an intervention and get him rehab...

Don't eat yellow snow!